With Love Now & Forever Read online

  With Love; Now & Forever

  BY RAEANNE HADLEY

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright© by RaeAnne Hadley ISBN 978-0-557-35076-6

  Cover illustration by Steven Rutledge www.stevenrutledge.com This book is dedicated to all of my family and friends who have helped support me. They know that writing to me is as important as breathing and have given me the

  encouragement when I needed it and a swift kick in the ego butt when I doubted myself. My husband who is so wonderful to let me bounce ideas and phrases off of him, even if he is in the middle of his games. Thank you to my musical inspirations that help me with my ever changing moods that flow through to my characters, I need that anger, that sorrow, that happiness, that sexuality. My ipod worked overtime on this one. Of course, thanks to my Dad, though he isn’t with me in his physical form, he is always with me in spirit.

  Chapter One

  The hot southern air was thick with humidity and so still that even the birds flying towards their evening roost couldn‘t seem to stir it. The

  cicadas attempted to break through the silence but their music sounded as heavy and bloated as the steam coming up from the streets. The bedroom in the older mobile home was small and cramped but Austin had cleaned his room and scattered flower petals over the made bed, trying to make it as romantic as possible. The little table fan worked incessantly, clicking and whirling, its faint breeze ineffectually cooling the air but caused the flames of the burning candles to cast dancing shadows across the room. Ana knew he had gone above and beyond to make their first time special and magical but she couldn't stop her apprehensions. It wasn't because of him, all she had to do was look into his eyes or hear his voice to know she was ready and willing to give herself to him. At sixteen years old, she knew he was the one she was going to spend the rest of her life loving.

  No, her apprehension tonight had nothing to do with him and everything to do with his mother. His mother never liked her and made it obvious that she put up with her because her son loved her, and her young heart was saddened at the thought that her future mother-in-law couldn’t see the whole picture as gaining a daughter but more of losing her one and only son.

  The touch of his hand cupping her face brought her back to the moment and conflicting emotions of desire and fear stole over her. Believing her shudder as anticipation, he started kissing her. Oh God, how she could lose herself in this man! She knew others didn’t see him as a man yet, being only a year her senior, but she looked at him as her man, her love and her future. She knew they would be together forever and that they were meant for each other, soul mates, as some would describe. But she couldn’t push away the fear that they shouldn’t be doing this tonight.

  "Austin, I can't do this, not now!" she whispered. He pulled back a little and looked at her, confusion filling his eyes.

  "I thought you were ready, you told me you were. Have I done something....?" his voice trailed off.

  "Oh honey, no! I love you and I haven't changed my mind. It's just your mom, she could come home at any minute and if she finds us, she'll never forgive me, defiling her only son under her own roof!" Hearing those words come out of her mouth sounded silly and she couldn't hold back her giggle.

  "She's not going to be back for a while. She's having supper with my aunt and then they’re playing cards. Dad is closing the shop tonight so he won’t be home until at least eleven. We have plenty of time!" He resumed the kisses that led to her ears and she felt her inhibitions melt away. Beautiful, compassionate Austin. His dark hair and deep blue eyes always amazed her because of their stark contrast. Facial features that were slightly awkward now would mature into a masculine face that would soon cause women to turn their heads. As striking as Austin was, Ana loved him for his heart and his mind.

  "It's going to be fine baby, I love you. I'm going to marry you no matter what anyone says and someday, I'm going to be someone! We'll have it made, our love will survive anything and we’ll have more money than you've ever dreamed possible!"

  She listened to his vows of the future and believed them to be true, whenever Austin put his mind to something, he got it done, nothing held him back.

  He eased her back onto the bed and she gave a heavy sigh of contentment. If Austin said he was going to marry her, he would, she needed to stop being such a worry-wart. She gazed around his room, which sat at the front of the trailer and overlooked the street. Shelves of books, art work, mostly his, on the walls and awards for singing competitions were scattered haphazardly throughout the room. He was talented in the arts; creativity, music and drama were his passion. Although he had a body that could have easily mastered basketball, soccer or football, he chose to spend his free time using his imagination, creating other worlds with paint and brushes, acting out roles for the school drama classes and using his heavenly voice to sing praises of love, life and happiness. How many nights had he sung to her? Used his voice to seduce her in his truck, never pushing to go all the way, but enough to make her wet and hot? He was so talented, in so many ways, she knew he was going to go far in this life and she was going to be right beside him, loving him, supporting him.

  She moaned as he caught the tender spot on her neck with his teeth and she started unbuttoning his shirt. His warm hand hesitated at the swell of her breast, unsure of whether he would be permitted to proceed or not. When Ana didn’t protest, he moved his hand over her breast, pushing her bra up at the same time. Her breath caught in her throat as he began to play with her nipple and she floundered at pulling his shirt off of him, kissing his neck and his chest. This wasn’t the first time she had seen him with his shirt off as they’d spent many summer days swimming at the pond. She had always marveled at the dark colored, soft hair that grew on his chest, how it curled around his nipples and trailed down his stomach to his navel. Her eyes were constantly drawn to where that trail of hair disappeared below his waistline and that’s where her imagination took over. Of course she had the sex education classes in school but she had never seen a real naked man, only the drawn illustrations that were approved by the school to teach the students of the physical attributes of the opposite sex.

  Feeling bolder, she moved her hands down to his thighs and then slipped in between them, gently cupped the bulge that pressed against his jeans. She heard him moan with his own pleasure and she began to softly knead and stroke against the rough fabric, as Austin’s hips began to move rhythmically against her hand and he moved his hand down between her legs.

  She had never let him go as far as she was allowing him tonight and she felt a hot, wet sensation spread at her feminine center. Her hips began to rise to his touch, as if her body had taken over to fulfill it’s own need and she allowed herself to react, surprised at how natural it all felt. She moved her hand away from his groin to unzip his pants. Austin was already working on her shorts, sliding them down her long, slender legs. She had a moments hesitation as her mind briefly flickered back to the possibility of being caught but her body quickly overcame her fear, she wouldn't worry tonight, she was with the man she loved. He was her best friend and the first man she had ever loved. She closed her eyes to savor the moment and shut out the rest of the world. She never saw the reflection of light bounce off his walls as down the road, headlights turned onto their street…

  CHAPTER TWO

  "A

  na, hello! Are you there? Come back to earth!" Anastasia Cassadine’s reverie was broken and the memories

  of the past wavered away like the heat off of a long stretch of hig
hway. She sighed and turned to face her assistant and friend.

  "I'm here, what's up Sally?" Ana tried to focus on her, the petite, five foot two inch brunette who had a killer body.

  Ana's blasé tone of voice caused Sally's eyebrow to rise and Ana knew she hadn't fooled her friend. Sally stared at her boss and friend. Ana was a stunning beauty. At five foot nine, Ana had grown into her skin and in Sally’s opinion, could have done anything in this world that she had put her mind to. Her long, flowing hair was lighter than the color of winter wheat, her dimples so deep that they peeked out even when she wasn’t smiling and her face still held the illusion of innocence. Her delicate features fooled people into believing she wasn’t as strong as she truly was, which turned out to be their downfall. Anastasia Cassadine was a person not to be underestimated.

  "Thinking of Prince Charming again?" There was no sarcasm in Sally's voice. Being Ana's only friend for over five years, Ana had finally confided her disturbing past with Austin.

  That fateful night had changed Ana's life and she had never seen her true love again. Although it had been almost twelve years ago and Ana had dated many men, she never found that someone who filled her heart the way Austin had. Ana met most of her “dates” through business seminars and resort representatives who saw her and instantly thought of a fairy tale princess who needed rescuing. If she wasn’t interested in them for business purposes but was attracted to them physically, she allowed them to believe they were her Adonis, her hero. The courtship was fast, furious and full of passion but ended before the men knew what had hit them. They were there for Ana’s carnal pleasures and never filled the void that Austin had previously occupied.

  Whenever Sally had broached the subject of tracking Austin down, Ana's eyes clouded with pain and she would quickly change the subject. The one time Sally pushed the subject, Ana broke down into sobs, claiming that Austin would never forgive her. Seeing the pain Sally caused, she never mentioned it again, until now.

  "Ana, you’ve got to stop doing this. I love you to death but you're not getting any younger and…” she cut in quickly, “you're not getting any happier. In your case, time does not heal all wounds, they seem to bleed a little faster with you. It’s as if the more successful you are in your professional life, the more you recede from your personal life. You can't keep on this way!"

  Sally noticed the flicker of a smile on Ana's face but saw through to the pain that flowed behind those light blue eyes. “I know you're worried, Sally, and I appreciate it but really, I'm okay. With all of these contracts, I just don't have time to date, let alone meet Mr. Right. Mr. Right Now will do just fine to fill in the gaps. Now, if you have Mr. Branson's file, I'd like to go over his itinerary before my flight."

  Early in their friendship stages, after they had become comfortable in their working relationship, Sally was thrilled when she saw Ana dating some of the more prominent men in New York and hoped that Ana was finally moving on with her life. But it quickly became apparent that Ana never took them seriously and only kept them around for her physical desires, never wanting a commitment. Most of the men she dated were thrilled with this relationship until Ana got bored and moved on to the next prospect. Some of them wouldn’t let go which resulted in dozens of flowers, jewelry and exotic perfumes showing up at Ana’s office. She never took her dates to her place, claiming that home was her sanctuary and she didn’t want the imposition of dealing with a snubbed lover constantly returning to her haven.

  Her sprawling condo was the only place she felt safe, where she could let her guard and defenses down. Her living room was the center focal point with the open kitchen blending into the background. She loved cooking and would often spend an evening experimenting with a new recipe while watching a movie on the big screen television across the living room.

  Her place would be perfect for entertaining if she ever decided to let people in. Her bedrooms were secluded down the hallway where her bedroom suite had its own master bath. A half-bath was situated off of the living room and an expansive southern facing deck ran the length of the living room and kitchen. Floor to ceiling windows provided the only separation of the outdoors and the interior comfort.

  The two times Sally had come over for work meetings, she had been enveloped in Ana’s oversized, soft eggplant colored chairs while Ana lounged on the matching sofa. All of the furniture in Ana’s condo had been purchased for the sole purpose of comfort and although with her style was eclectic, it looked exquisite and planned. Sally sometimes believed Ana picked her men that way, exquisite and flashy but also just an after thought and completely disposable. Seeing the beautiful men and some of the enlightened souls Ana pushed away caused frustration and, occasionally, jealousy in Sally. After Ana dumped a very sweet and handsome architect, Sally snapped haughtily at her. “Hey Ana, if you don’t want him, give him my number. I’m still looking for Mr. Right. My time clock is ticking and some of these guys are Prince Charming’s who should be allowed to find their Cinderella.” Hoping that she could guilt Ana out of her mournful state backfired, Ana willingly set up “meetings” with some of the men she had dated. On Ana’s part, she seemed relieved that these men were now distracted with Sally and showed no signs of jealousy or remorse. On Sally’s part, she found these men were willing to date her to try to stay in Ana’s life and find out more about Ana, not Sally. Eventually, she stopped agreeing to these “set-ups” and stopped trying to fix Ana’s path of meaningless relationships.

  Sally also didn’t want to risk her six digit income or lose the first true friend she had made in New York in five years. She watched Ana go through men like she did shoes and it shouldn’t be her business but it had to stop before Ana’s careless actions started affecting the company reputation. The media was not kind and if some scorned lover went to the press with Ana’s out-of-control ways, things could get nasty.

  Sally decided the only way that she could end this selfdestructive behavior was to track down Ana’s first love, Austin Troy. The sooner Ana could confront Austin and work out their past to free her of the guilt that she still felt, the sooner Ana could get on with her personal life, successfully. Knowing that Ana would fight and argue if she knew what her plans were, Sally decided to keep quiet until she actually had Austin’s phone number in her hands. This was going to be for Ana’s own good, and some day she was going to thank Sally for taking this extra step.

  CHAPTER THREE

  Ana’s Friday morning started out as any other morning. Dressed in a black, pinstriped Giovanni suit with a soft pink camisole, she

  was at the office by seven o’clock in the morning with her cup of coffee and flavored yogurt with granola. She had her thick, blonde hair pulled back into a soft French braid that was tucked under and was secured by a matching pink bow. Simple diamond studs adorned her ears and a small gold chain at her neck was the extent of her jewelry.

  She was not one to get bored very easily, given all of the clientele and places that she had to take care of and book, but she was starting to wonder if there was something more, something different for her. She was always booking extravagant vacations to exotic places but she had never experienced them herself. Whenever she went to a resort to inspect it for her clients, it was always strictly business and back on the plane to come home without ever having set foot on a sandy beach or wander the town. Maybe it was time she took a vacation and went to stay at some of these places that her clients always raved about.

  After a late lunch, she sat and gazed out of the high rise window of her office, which overlooked New York to the west. She had paid a pretty penny, first for just the office and then the building, but she thought it was worth it. Her office was in the corner and had floor to ceiling windows. No matter which way she turned, she had a view. Even the walls that led out to the hallway and reception area were glass. She had experienced the feeling of being trapped once in her life and vowed never to experience that again. Her desk was composed of dark granite that sat over a rich, dark cherry wood. Her
chair was high-backed, made with the most expensive suede leather that money could buy and resembled that of a small throne. The two chairs that sat on the other side of her desk were made of similar suede, but it was obvious to anyone that came into her office that she was the queen of her domain.

  She had just decided to pick some place far from New York to take her vacation when Sally walked into her office, wearing a pair of dark blue leggings, calf-high black leather boots with a long satin over-shirt splattered with bold colors. She also walked with the air and smugness of someone who has valuable information and knows it. This usually meant Sally had found a new client who didn’t have a spending limit, so Ana perked up and gave her her full attention.

  “You know I love you, Ana.”

  A sickening feeling started in the pit of Ana’s stomach. Gut instinct indicated this was not going to be good, this was not the way Sally usually started talking about a big client. Ana sat back in her chair, bracing herself.

  “I’ve watched you suffer for too many years and I’m hoping to end your pain now.” Knowing that Ana was about to argue, she plunged forward. “I have Austin’s phone number, he lives in Sussex, England. I want you to call him, arrange to meet with him and get everything off your chest. You deserve to be happy and this is the only way you can do it.”

  For the first time in her relationship with Ana, Sally began to doubt herself. She had never seen this look on Ana’s face and finally recognized it as pure terror. Tears started welling in Ana’s eyes and it was Sally’s turn to panic. She had not anticipated this reaction from Ana. She had expected anger, to be yelled at, had even played out the argument Ana would present and the rebuttal argument Sally would come back with but this, this she had never imagined.

  “Oh, Ana, come on honey, you have suffered long enough. You’ve got to clean these ghosts and skeletons out of your closet!”