Falling, Fallen- Reese Read online

  Falling,

  Fallen

  RaeAnne Hadley

  To my devoted fans, friends and followers. This is for all of the souls who dream about the one who got away.

  Copyright © 2020 by RaeAnne Hadley

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed “Attention: Permissions Coordinator,” at the address below.

  Artistry Utopia Publishing

  21661 Hwy 550

  Montrose, CO 81403

  [email protected]

  Reese rubbed a hand over the front of his face in frustration. Rachel wasn’t returning his phone calls or answering her door when he knocked. He wasn’t sure what was going on but he wanted answers. They had been dating for almost a year and he thought they were on a fast-track to getting engaged but now she was acting like he wasn’t worth her time.

  He dialed her cell phone again and despite his hope that she would pick up this time, his heart dropped when her voicemail came on. It had only rung three times so he knew she declined the call.

  He almost threw his phone across the room in frustration but desperation for answers had him texting her; the one thing he detested about modern technology. It was so easy to ghost someone nowadays. There was no such thing as having to get your hands dirty when it came to social interactions.

  Rachel pick up your phone. I need to know what’s wrong? I show up at your work with a dozen roses and you blew me off. Did I do something wrong? Please, please baby, just talk to me.

  He almost put in that he loved her but something held him back. Maybe that was too much at this point. He hit send and waited for a reply. The little bubble icon popped up on his screen and he held his breath waiting to read her answer. At least she was talking to him. The bubble went away and he waited, and waited, and waited. The bubble never reappeared and he set the phone down. He wasn’t going to get any answers right now.

  The sound of horses whinnying and cows mooing reminded him he was late getting started with chores. He stood up and grabbed his beat-up Stetson from the back of the couch. Stetson, his border collie with the same name as his favorite hat, leapt to his feet, eager to start the day.

  Reese looked down at his dog and shook his head. “Why can’t women be more like you? At least you enjoy my company.”

  Stetson barked and wagged his tail which made Reese chuckle.

  “C’mon boy. Let’s go feed the girls and get on with our day.”

  He closed the door behind him, the latch clicking just as his cell phone beeped with a new message.

  He emptied his third beer and read the text again. The words hadn’t changed, he hadn’t misread them and he still didn’t like the answer. Every time he read her text message, the pain that shot through his heart got a little sharper. How could he have been so wrong about her; about them? Plans of their future together, the life and the family they would build together was something he thought of often.

  He strode towards the trash, slamming the beer bottle into the metal can, it’s glass shattering against the other discarded bottles. Ripping open the refrigerator door and grabbing another bottle, he glared at the text message again.

  Reese, I just don’t see it working between us. You are a great guy but I’m just not interested in a serious relationship. I hope you have a wonderful life. You’ll find someone who makes you happy.

  “You made me happy, Rachel,” he grumbled as he sat back down on the couch. It was almost midnight and he was going to pay for his indulgence in the morning but right now he didn’t care. His soul wanted more answers and the chance to plead his case to her but despite his many text messages back to her, the little bubble never showed up again.

  He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. He felt a tear slip down his cheek and he angrily swiped it away. He would have to live his life without the woman who had stolen his heart and shattered it. Rachel was never coming back.

  Fifteen Years Later

  Reese waved goodbye to his son, Jake, as Jennifer hugged his waist tightly. Even though she was now twelve, she was still very much daddy’s girl and she hated leaving him. If he was honest, he hated them leaving too but knew that his ex-wife Sarah was much happier with her new husband.

  He squeezed his daughter tightly before kissing her on the top of her head. “Don’t make your mother wait. You know she gets impatient when her schedule gets messed up. You’ll be back for next weekend and we will go on that trail ride I promised.”

  She stared up at him and he was hit by how much she looked like him. Those blue eyes and blonde hair were a mirror image of his own.

  She smiled and held up her pinky. “Pinky promise?”

  He latched onto her pinky with his own and shook it. “Pinky promise.”

  She giggled and skipped out the door to the waiting minivan. Sarah waved and he smiled and waved back. He waited until they drove down the tree-lined driveway then turned and sat down on the porch rocker. When had divorce and blended families become the norm?

  At the time that he met Sarah, he hadn’t been looking for anything serious. He had still been smarting from the break up with Rachel. Hanging out with his brothers at the local dance hall, he spent most of his time up at the bar drinking. Occasionally he’d watch his brothers make an ass out of themselves as they tried fancier dance moves other than the two-step that they knew. Then one night an attractive brunette came up and started a conversation with him.

  She hadn’t come across as flirtatious, just nice. He found her conversations engaging and pretty soon they were meeting at the bar two to three times a week. Talking turned into dancing and he realized he missed the feel of a woman in his arms.

  Stetson’s barking disrupted his thoughts and he stood up to see what the commotion was. He saw one of his heifers down and straining. Her calf was stuck and he was going to have to help deliver it. Hopefully he’d be able to save momma and the calf both.

  Thoughts of the past women in his life dissipated with the sun.

  “You need to get signed up for SocialPage before Mom kicks my ass.”

  Reese rolled his eyes as his brother’s voice boomed through the phone. “Aren’t you being a little dramatic, Reyker?”

  “Dude, she still uses wooden spoons.”

  He started laughing, picturing their mother chasing Reyker with a wooden spoon to break over his butt. “Fine. I’ll get signed up today after I get chores done.”

  “Make sure you post pictures of Jake and Jennifer. She wants to see them.”

  “She just saw them in person three months ago.”

  “I’m just repeating what she told me so don’t shoot the messenger.”

  “Fine. Now let me go so I can get chores done.”

  “Cool. Hey, are we still on for tomorrow night?”

  “Yep. Jackson is the designated driver, right?”

  “Yeah. He still thinks we cheated with the straws but someone had to pick the short one.”

  “Cows are calling. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Remember SocialPage.”

  “I will. Your nagging is as bad as a woman’s.”

  “Ass.”

  Reese laughed as he ended the call and picked up his hat. Stetson was already at the door waiting.

  He got his chores done before one, having to tag three new calves that had been born during the early morning hours. He felt lucky that he hadn’t lost any pairs so
far this year and he only had ten heifers left to calve. This year was starting out to be pretty good, in his opinion. Hopefully the rest of the year would follow the same path.

  Grabbing a bologna sandwich and some chips, he sat at the kitchen table and woke up his laptop. It shouldn’t take too long to sign up for the social media page his mother had been harping on him to join.

  Despite the fact that she only lived a couple hundred miles away and Reese made sure he came home with the kids every few months, she insisted that she missed too much of their lives. Pictures and updates on their life and antics were a gift that she had asked for at their last visit. He wasn’t big on social media junk but for her, he would do it.

  He signed up as he finished his sandwich and began searching for his family. His brothers were easy to find and he was surprised to see how many “friends” they had on their pages. He sent a request to his mother and was surprised when she accepted immediately. A small window popped up and he shook his head. She was already messaging him.

  It’s about damn time you signed up. I only asked you months ago. Make sure you get Jennifer’s flute recital loaded up. I want to see it.

  He groaned. Uploading videos would take time out of his day and he was already late getting his obligations taken care of.

  Mom, I just got signed up. It’s going to take me some time to get stuff uploaded and I need to get Sarah’s permission to post stuff of the kids.

  I already talked to Sarah and she was fine with it. Just keep your setting private and then only family or friends can see your posts. They won’t be public.

  “Of course you already talked with Sarah,” he grumbled.

  While he was thankful that there had been no hard feelings between Sarah and his family, he didn’t like the fact that Sarah and his mom seemed to talk more than he and Sarah did.

  Fine. I’ll start working on that once I get my chores done. I do have a ranch to run, remember?

  Don’t get snappy with me. If you had done this back when I asked you, you’d have everything uploaded by now. You boys be safe tomorrow night and remember that I love you.

  He sighed. Of course she knew what her boys were doing. Their mother knew everything.

  I will, Mom. I love you too. Talk to you later.

  He took a few minutes to check out his brothers’ pages, laughing at some of their posts. Friend suggestions popped up and he was surprised by some of the childhood friends that were listed. He sent requests to a few guys he used to hang out with in high school before setting up his own page.

  He chose a photo of him at a roping competition three years ago. The photographer had hit the timing perfectly as the noose was settling over the calf’s head, his horse’s ears perked, Reese’s face focused on the animal running in front of him. He looked badass and it reminded him of when he had found peace with his life.

  He filled out the “about me” section, keeping it simple, before starting to upload Jennifer’s recital for his mother. He could upload more stuff later this evening but this was the only thing he had time for. He still needed to go get the hay bales stacked into the barn before the next storm.

  Once the video had uploaded and processed, he closed down his computer and grabbed his hat. It felt good having that one thing done for his mother and felt relieved he wouldn’t be harped on anymore. SocialPage was now part of his life.

  Jackson and Reyker were already at the bar when he showed up. Jackson was out dancing with a petite little brunette while Reyker sat at the bar watching. Reese sidled up to his younger brother and punched him in the arm.

  “It’s considered creepy if you stare longer than five minutes.”

  Reyker turned and punched him back. “Only when you do it.” He nodded over where Jackson and the woman were closing the gap between them. “How does he always get the gorgeous chicks?”

  Reese turned and watched his older brother on the floor. “Because he’s always been the better looking one. He got Dad’s darker hair with blue eyes,” he patted Reyker’s shoulder. “We got Mom’s blonde hair.”

  “You did. Mine has red mixed in.”

  “That’s because the milkman has red hair.”

  “Ass.”

  The music ended and Jackson strolled over, the brunette walking back to her group of friends, throwing longing glances over her shoulder.

  “Bro! You made it.”

  “Yep. Where’s the pitcher?”

  “We were waiting to see what you were in the mood for.”

  “I’m good with whatever. It’s Friday night.”

  Reyker snorted. “And what does that have anything to do with it? Cows don’t give a shit if it’s Friday, Tuesday, any day. Twenty-four-seven-three-sixty-five.”

  Reese nodded. “True but the young ladies who come out to dance care.” He glanced around the dance hall, admiring all the pretty young fillies who had come out, celebrating the end of the week.

  “And pretty they are tonight.”

  All three men leaned back against the bar and admired the ladies on the dance floor. When the bartender set down their pitcher of beer, Jackson filled the three glasses and raised his in a toast.

  “To all of the pretty young ladies tonight. May we find pleasure in our arms tonight.”

  Reese shook his head. “I’m going home alone tonight.”

  “Dude, your bedroom sure has been lonely lately. Don’t you think it’s time to spread your wings again?”

  “I did and it ended up in a divorce.”

  “You just haven’t met the right girl yet.”

  Reese was surprised when the pain in his gut hit him hard. Rachel’s face and the sound of her laughter filled his mind. “I did, I just lost her is all.”

  Reyker patted Reese’s shoulder. “Damn man, I didn’t think you were that broken up about Sarah.”

  Reese chugged back the rest of his beer. “I’m not. She’s an amazing woman, a fantastic mother but she wasn’t my person. That was already filled by someone before her.”

  He heard her laughter again and he quickly filled his glass again. He couldn’t afford to lose his head right now. “I swear I still hear her laughter.”

  The cute little brunette who had been dancing with Jackson earlier came up to the group of guys and after batting her eye lashes shyly, asked him to dance again.

  Jackson looked at his brothers, a cocksure grin on his face. “You losers have fun crying over your beers. Duty calls.” He winked as he grabbed the young lady’s hand and led her to the dance floor. Reyker watched with a scowl.

  “Do you think Mom would be okay if she only had two sons?”

  Reese laughed. “You do that and I’ll end up being an only child. She’s not one I’d want to cross.”

  Reyker blew out his breath. “Yeah, you are right.”

  A curvy redhead sashayed up to them and flashed a bright smile at Reyker. “I, um, was wanting to know if you wanted to dance?”

  He grinned broadly and tipped his hat. “It would be my pleasure, little lady.” He socked Reese in the arm before following the woman. “You’re on your own, bro.”

  “More beer for me,” Reese hollered after but realized he was the one who was missing out. He pulled the bar stool out and sat down. This was probably going to be the most action he was going to get tonight. His head just wasn’t in the game. Games. That’s all it seemed to be in the dating world. Games, playing a part, seeing who gets the upper hand. What happened to finding a partner? Someone who was there to lift you up when you were down and you do the same for them? Did you really have to play all of the damn games to find that? He wasn’t in the mood anymore.

  Rachel’s laughter filled his ears and he slammed his glass down, spilling some of the amber liquid. “Damn, why can’t I get her out of my head?”

  “Excuse me?”

  Reese whirled around on his stool and came face to face with the bartender. “Sorry man. I was bitching to myself.”

  The bartender laughed. “If you were bitching then it was probab
ly about a woman.”

  Reese joined the man’s laughter. “Yep. I keep hearing the laughter of my ex and it’s driving me insane.”

  The bartender nodded over to a table in the corner of the room by the pool tables. “She’s been laughing all night. Her voice carries but it sure is sweet.”

  Reese frowned. “You hear it? I thought it was all in my head.”

  The laughter floated across to them again. “That laughter?”

  Reese nodded and craned his neck to look over at the table. Excitement and dread created an uncomfortable blob in his stomach that extended to his throat. Was Rachel really here? Did he want to see her? He hadn’t seen her in years. Had she changed? Would she remember him? Should he go over and say something? If so, what?

  He filled his glass and contemplated what he should do. The bartender cleared his throat.

  When Reese looked up at him, the man was throwing his rag over his shoulder and nodded his head over to the other side of the bar. Reese’s breath caught in his throat. Rachel was walking over to the bar, two empty pitchers in her hands.

  She hadn’t seen him and he was suddenly unsure that he wanted her to. He slumped lower in his seat watching her from the corner of his eye. She beamed at the bartender as she ordered two more pitchers.

  His gut ached. She looked the same as she had fifteen years ago. Her blonde hair fell in long waves down her back and her blue eyes sparkled. He saw the flash of her dimples and was suddenly jealous of the bartender who was the recipient of her smile.

  The man turned to fill her order and when Reese saw her starting to look around, quickly focused on his beer glass.

  “Reese?”

  His groan was soft as he looked up. She had spotted him. Time to play it cool. “Rachel? Wow, how are you?”

  She grinned and strode over to him, giving him a one-armed hug. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. She wore a different perfume from what she’d worn when they were dating, but she still smelled like heaven. Her soft hair tickled his cheek. She released him and stepped back.